Guards up

I don’t exactly know how to go on. I don’t know where i’m at.

I’ve been trying to keep myself from talking to you and from updating myself on how you are right now. I’m doing these but i, myself, don’t even know if these were the right steps to take. We’re not exactly on that stage. Damn. We have never been on any stage.

Maybe this is my defense mechanism acting right now. I know deep inside that i won’t be able to absorb whatever the truth is (especially the negative one). I guess i’m just too scared to feel the pain ’cause i know it’ll be harder for me to move on.

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