Before i started to write this letter, i decided to re-read our last conversation. I realized that i overreacted and acted a bit childish when i blocked you from chat but i just can’t take this anymore. I needed a way to distance myself from you so i can easily move on. It’s just heartbreaking.. The way you’re treating me. I feel like you’re taking my presence for granted. I feel like trash. This is not the way you treated me before.
I fell for the version of you who treated me like i was the only girl you see. The version of you who always acted so stupid just so you can get my attention. You used to exert so much effort to make me turn to you. I miss those days when you would immediately reply to my every message and not leave me hanging. Those days when you respected me, complimented me, and praised me; when you would talk to me seriously and share the things you have in your mind. You also were the first one who believed in me; the first person who believed i can make it as a successful copywriter. I fell so hard for you when you gave attention to the smallest detail about me. I thought you were so adorable when you would answer me, “i have my sources” everytime i asked you “how did you know that?” You treated me like a princess and i miss that.. To be honest.
But ever since you shifted, everything changed. You took me for granted. You’re not treating me like you usually did. It’s depressing to admit that i don’t have any worth for you anymore. The things that you did which made me fall are the complete opposite of the things that you are doing now. It’s heartbreaking everytime you don’t reply to my messages. It hurts my pride when you intentionally ignore me.
I have done so much. I have risked so much. I had my pride rested down so low that i lost my self-respect. I am getting tired. I need to pull my pride back up now. I lost myself. I didn’t know who i was anymore. So, i am moving on.
You are not the man i was looking for. I just can’t wait for you forever. KR, thank you for making me feel like i was the most special girl.. But i guess things are really not going to work out.
PS i know that you’ll never be able to read this but maybe someday, when i am brave enough..